I had to search my archives clear back to 2009 to find it. Re-reading it, I realized my hesitation for sharing it… This story is about to let you in on a secret… I am truly weird!
I know you think that you knew that about me already, but I assure you… It gets worse!
“A Conversation With Money.”
I was watching the movie The Secret with the commentaries on, when the writer of the movie said. “This teacher’s whole message is about love, and this is so important. If you want money to come into your life then you have to fall in love with money. Most people have ill feelings when it comes to money. But I tell you, if you can fall in Love with money it will change your life.”
I thought about that for a while and about all the bills I was behind in. I kept thinking about how I would love to be in love with money but I didn’t know how.
So I thought. “What would it take for me to fall in love with money? To fall in love with an inanimate object just feels weird. – So how can I personify money?”
I remembered a roll playing game that I had used for forgiveness work, where I took two pairs of shoes. (Flip flops for easy changing.) I named one pair myself and the other pair was the roll of the other person I was trying to forgive. So, I decided to try that again but this time make the other pair of shoes be Money.
I got out a brown pair to represent me and a shiny black pair to represent money. Then I placed the shoes across the room from each other and stepped into the brown pair.
I thought “Is there any thing I need to say to Money?” I stood there patiently but nothing came to mind.
I next stepped into the pair representing money and asked myself. “Is there anything Money would like to say to me?” After standing there for a few seconds I felt compelled to start pacing back and forth and began to feel indignant. I turned and looked at the shoes representing me and stated loudly…
You have nothing to say to me? How about a little gratitude or a little appreciation? Is it no wonder that I don’t want any part of your life? You treat me really badly. You have absolutely no respect for me!
I stepped out of the shoes more then a little shook up by this, I just stood there. Could this be true? Could I be treating money badly? So I stepped into my brown shoes and acting as myself I said.
“I treat you badly? How? You’re never around to be treated badly.”
Stepping back into the shiny black shoes I felt immediately like pacing again. Hands on hips I walked back and forth and then said.
“Oh yes I am. You however are ungrateful and rude. You pretend I am not around but I am always around. I am everywhere! In fact I am in everything there is.”
At this point I realized that continuously changing shoes was going to be a challenge so I slipped out of one black shoe and put the brown one on my left foot. This way I could merely lean between the two as the dialog continued. I leaned on my brown shoe and asked.
“I am having a hard time with picturing money as all there is… How do I bring that idea into my understanding?”
Look around you. Everything you own is in one way or another purchased by money and therefore represents me!
“No not everything… How about the rocks and plants all the animals and the Ocean. I see no connection to you (Money) there.”
“This is true… The ocean is free, but if you want to get to the ocean you may have to walk a very long way to get there. If you choose to use a car or a bike you will need to use money… Wear a swim suite or bring a towel… Guess what Money again.”
“I see that. But the ocean and the fish are free.”
“Yes sort of… I’ll try another approach.
You can live a life without money but it is a very dismal existence. Let’s say you are a shipwrecked survivor on a small uninhabited Island. You try to whittle yourself a hook to fish with but you keep breaking the hook because the rock you’re using is a clumsy tool. Instead you realize that you will have to learn patience and learn to spear fish. So you whittle a sharp point on a stick. You wade out into the water and you poise the spear and wait.
Guess what! I am now the fish!!”
“You are the fish? The fish is money? How?”
“You want the fish… The fish has value to you, therefore, you have just put a price on it. How much time will you SPEND to catch it? And again I enter the picture. All that I am… All money is… Is a representation of value, and absolutely everything has value. The ocean, the animals, the rocks down to the air you can not see but need to breathe has value. And since all that money is, is the representation of value. I am therefore all there is.”
“Okay wait… Money is the representation of Value. I can understand that. But what does that have to do with the fact that I never have any money to spend… Why do you say that I have no respect for you?”
“So far you have not valued my friendship enough to keep me near you. You close yourself off from me continuously by saying.“I Don’t have enough money. I’ll never have enough money to do that.” Etc.”
“I see all the things that I would love to do if I had enough money and then I look and see all of my bills, and I don’t see away to do both.”
You need to stop seeing the things that you want to do and saying… “I don’t have enough money to do both.” Because you are commanding me to only give you enough to pay the bills. You need to look at the things that you want lets say a new boat… You need to say to yourself or out loud so that everyone and everything can hear you.“I would like to have enough money to have and drive that boat.” And better yet add.“While paying all my expenses comfortably.”
“I see the boat and try to think of things I could do to bring money into my life so that I can have the boat. But then I think, I don’t want to give up the fun things that I do to go do more work to bring in more money.”
“All you have to do is ask me and I’ll come to you. You keep trying to figure out ways to get to me. But there is no path to get to me. There is no way at all that you can “Get to me.” I always have to COME TO YOU! Every time you tell someone “I don’t have enough money. “ You are pushing me away. This is because if I were to come to you at that moment I would make you a liar! You can not say… “I don’t have enough money.” And expect me to show up. It has never worked, and I don’t understand why you keep saying it.
Think of me as a two year old child. This two year old child is running hard and fast away from you. If the child doesn’t want to go to you, there is nothing you can DO to make this two year old child come to you. You can DO nothing. When the child doesn’t want to come to you, you cannot call the child and have it obey. You can not shout the child’s name and have it hear you. You think that you should be able to DO something but it just isn’t so. So you DO jump up and run to the child and pick it up forcibly and get your way. But the child only allows you to grasp it for so long before she wriggles screaming from your fingers and again leaves. You need to Be who the child wants to play with. You need to BE someone who I (money) would enjoy playing with.”
“So what you’re saying is… You don’t WANT to BE with me?”
“CORRECT! Why would I want to be with you? You treat me really badly!”
“I do? How?”
You invited me to come with you on a trip to California and Oregon… You said… “I’d like to make enough money that we can go to Oregon with our friends.” Then you pretended like I wasn’t even there. You got there and immediately you start telling everyone. “I don’t have any money! I have to be careful how much I spend because I barely have enough to cover the Gas.”
You go out and you go hiking… You fix food in the camper because it’s cheap and you don’t have to take me out of your precious wallet! You kept me locked up and hidden from view for the entire trip and rarely even spoke of me. And when you did speak of me it was to ridicule me and tell other people how little of me that you see!
I ask you… How much time would you want to spend with someone who treated you this way?
Remember your friend in Puerto Rico in “Invited” you and Ken to a barbecue at his house? “Hey Ken… Why don’t you come with me to San Juan? We’ll have a Bar-B-Que! Ken… I’m going to leave you to do the barbecuing while I take Amy Jo in the kitchen so she can help Lucy make the Potato salad… Then he disappeared into the living room to hang out with his friends for an hour while you guys made dinner… Was that fun for you? After dinner… “Amy Jo, sing my friends a song… Don’t you know any in Spanish? You Don’t? Oh well we’ll sing a few in Spanish with out you. But you can listen or help Ken clean up in the kitchen.”
You didn’t like it much, and you swore that you would never go with that guy again. This is the way that you ALWAYS TREAT ME!”
“I’m sorry. It is not my intention to treat you badly. I honestly didn’t know that you had any feelings.”
I’m having a problem grasping the idea that I can’t get to you… There is nothing that I can DO to get to you; You have to come to me.”
“Yes that is the way of it. You can not DO anything. You need to be something. – You need to be someone I would enjoy spending time with, and therefore, be someone who enjoys spending time with me. So far you are only stressed in my presence.
Oh sure you pretend to celebrate that I’ve come to visit. You say things like… “I just got paid, lets go out to dinner and have a steak!” But then you take me to dinner and buy a lousy pizza to take home! You don’t even buy drinks to go with it so that you can leave more of me in your wallet, locked up and out of sight! Let me say this… Thanks for the good time!”
“I am so sorry. That was not my intention. I happen to love pizza, and the fact that I could save you for other things was just a bonus.”
“That is not how it felt to me.”
Wow! I can see that now that you’ve said it.
(I just noticed that the copyright on this is January 27th 2009. I just searched my archives and found it again on January 27th 2018 So I’m thinking… Maybe I need to check in with Money again… Or better yet, how about a Court of Atonement with money!!
I ______________Place myself in a Full Court of Atonement with the spirit of money. I apologize to money for my behavior, and I ask to pardon money for all of my perceptions of problems with money. I ask money to also pardon me. In this Court of Atonement, I call in fear, scarcity and lack, as well as my lack of faith in money and lack of faith in myself. I bring in awareness of my attitude toward money. I ask for a life review from money’s perspective. I ask for this energy between us, to be healed on the astral plain. I bring in faith in my own abilities to be someone that money would love hanging out with . I bring in joy, happiness, sharing, stability, faith and certainty that there is abundance in the universe available to me at all times!
I_____________ call into this Full Court of Atonement the entirety of my family, and I ask that they too, be atoned for their relationship with money.
I place myself_________________ into A Full Court of Atonement with my jealousy as well as any hatred I might have toward those who have money, while I have had to do without! I ask to be pardoned for my behavior!
I place myself_________________ into a Full Court of Atonement with allowing myself to be open and willing to fall in love with money like a cherished friend!
I always reluctantly place my PayPal donation link on these pages. Today I tongue in cheek feel like saying.”Please consider helping to heal Amy Jo’s relation ship with money by donating at www.paypal.me/amyjoellis
To purchase the 22 page booklet The Court of Atonement go to www.thecourtofatonement.com